Ch. 24 - My Journey Continues

Ch. 24 - My Journey Continues

It has been a while since my last post, but I have just been taking some time to myself and trying to reflect on the journey that I have been through. After my radiation ended and my port was removed, I think I thought that I was finished... meaning, if no more treatment, no more suffering, or anything, just returning to myself. As much as I want that to be true, it is not. Since my last entry, I have received counseling by a psychiatrist named Dr. Miklusak. He is great and has really helped me in my recovery period. He has helped me to learn to take one day at a time and also to listen to my body when it is telling me to SLOW DOWN and take a moment to myself. Since radiation ended in March and I began Tamoxifen in April, I have had some crazy things happen to my body. For one, I did get my period. And boy did I get it!!! I had it for 3 months straight, with only about 3 days, twice, without bleeding. It was a nightmare and all of my doctors just told me to be patient, that the Tamoxifen would begin to suppress my ovary function and my period would go away. Well, they were right, but 3 MONTHS LATER. After I did stop bleeding, it was questionable of if I still had ovary function or not. This was a good question to determine it my new copper IUD was causing such extraordinary bleeding or if my ovaries had just kicked in and in high gear!! So Dr. Spencer-Smith checked my FSH level. Well, the level indicated that my ovaries were working afterall. This is good and bad! Good because I am young and I am sure that my husband would appreciate my keeping my hormones (avoiding the effects of early menopause) and bad because it means that I have to keep the IUD. This was okay with me just as long as I did not have such long bleeding again. Since that day in his office, my cycle has actually been normal and light. This is a silver lining. This however does not mean that I will get to have a baby naturally or even carry my own, but it does mean that I have ovary function which will keep my bones healthy and prevent early osteoporosis.

In regards to the childbearing question. Well, I have found a surrogate which is great news and we are hoping to be able to try to make that happen in about 1 year from now. It is not recommended for me to carry my own child because of me being estrogen receptor and progesterone receptor positive. This is okay with me though, well at least today it is, as long as our baby is healthy. And remember we have 8 frozen embryos waiting on us!!! Some days though I am not as positive regarding this experience being taken away from me, but I really try to keep a positive outlook.

I did have a bone scan done last week but have not gotten the results. I do experience extreme fatigue and joint aches from time to time, but I am told to expect this for up to 1 year. So for now, I am just checking in with all my doctors about every 3 months and trying to keep my usual smile on my face.

Thank you again for your support, thoughts, and prayers.